Sunday, June 19, 2011

National Guard vs. Active Army - Our Decision

I swear I regret the day me & John told anyone we were debating switching to active Army. We should have waited until the decision is 100% final like we did with the Guard. We are thinking of possibly switch to being active within 6 months of John getting home. Or after that. But his recruiter said the waiting period they like to have is about 6 months for National Guards members switching to the Army.

But ever since, anytime it even vaguely gets brought up by anyone, it suddenly is a place for everyone to throw out things to try & make us change our minds. Now this isn't every single person, but it is a lot of friends and family. Huh, didn't know that what John & I decide for OUR family officially has to be 100% okayed by everyone else in order for us to do something. We aren't uninformed. We aren't being rash in our decision making. We are discussing (with eachother). We are researching. We are asking questions to people who are currently in the Army. And we are making this decision on our own. You may think I am stubborn as a mule, which I tend to be, but this isn't something that I see any budge room on. I have given people their say, but I am officially not discussing it any further with anyone until John & I have decided exactly what we want to do. And that isn't going to be anytime soon, it'll be sometime within the first 6 months John is home.

So this is the final thing I will say to these comments/concerns/opinions that have come from a whole mess of family & friends:

  • You are taking the kids away from everyone that loves them! No, we aren't. We will still be there with them. And there would be new people where ever we would move to love & play with them. Where ever we go, we will build new support systems. And airplanes, remember those? Yeah, we are able to come home. Whenever we want and are able. John only gets a certain amount of leave, but me & the kids don't.
  • But he is going to get deployed! & You will be all alone! Well, duh. He will get deployed in the National Guard too. That is inevitable and something I knew would happen no matter which branch he wanted to join. And the kids & I will not be alone. We can move home on deployments if we want to. Although, if we have been somewhere long enough and have on-post housing, or any housing that we don't want to give up, we may stay there. And just come home to visit a lot. That is something that would be decided at that time. And honestly, living on post with a bunch of families going through exactly what we are, and having that huge support system, instead of being home for that year or however long it would be with people who have no clue what is going on, even though they are family, would be nice. Idk what we/I would decide when we get there, but that is something that would be decided then, not now.
  • Won't you miss us?! Clearly. I love all of our friends and family here. Remember those big metal things that fly? Airplanes! Precisely what they were created for. Visiting places & people. We would visit. You could visit if you want. There are also phones calls, texts, facebook, skype, email. A whole buttload of ways to communicate & keep up with people.
  • What about being away from home? Minnesota will always be home. And we have already said we want to make Minnesota our permanent home after any commitment is finished.  But honestly, I have always wanted to travel around the country & the world. To fully go into different cultures (even if it is just a different culture in the United States), would be amazing. So yeah, I am downright excited to be able to get out of Minnesota for a while. It is one of the things that I see as a huge perk of the military.
  • The Army is so unorganized! I don't think I have ever worked any place that has ever seemed organized. Besides nannying, because I organize it lol. Even when its chaotic. Yes the Army has a whole bunch of practices that aren't very organized, not everyone knows all of the information, some things people aren't allowed to know, many things are last-minute, and not every direction is plainly laid out for you. Is where you work any better? Yes the Army may be a 24/7 job instead of 9 hours a day 5 days a week; but in any of the restaurants or stores I have worked in, all of those components have been a part of it. The didn't affect my family necessarily, but they were all a part of work. This is just work, on a much larger scale.
This isn't at any one single person at all. I am not attacking anyone, I just wanted to get everything out at once, not 1200 different times. Because it is our family. No one else's. And for once, it would be nice to be treated that way. Whether you are friends or family, you need to accept whichever decision we make and leave it be and support us. Because we don't need drama-causing people in our lives. And especially right now when they are mostly just in my life.

Now I am going to go play with my kids and give them a great Father's Day, just like we would do if their daddy was here with us. I hope you are all doing the same :)

2 comments:

  1. I totally understand the frustration. Its your decision, your family, and your life. I know we support you guys no matter what you do, though we'll be sad to have to find someone to watch our kids and do it as well as you do! :-)

    One other way to look at it...at least people are sad to see you go! Wouldn't you be even sadder if no one cared? :-D

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  2. One of my favorite quotes...
    "You don't have to agree with my choices, but as my friends you do need to respect them."
    -Leigh Ann (Sandra Bullock) from The Blind Side

    Here for you Nicole, if you ever need an ear to listen :) God wouldn't bring you down any path He didn't want you on!

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